In 2015 Joe and I “finished” renovating this house, moved in and got married in the back yard. It was a big year for us, most of the spring and summer is a total blur, I ran from dawn until dusk every single day. I will never forget that hot August, two weeks before the wedding, I was painting the kitchen cabinets I just finished building going over and over and over again what had to get done before September 5th when we would be hosting 150 of our friends and family. It was wild. I’m so glad I’ll never be doing that again but it did prove something to me: we are much more capable then we ever give ourselves credit for. Every year after 2015 is going to appear tame to me I think (and thank goodness) 2016 is no exception. It’s funny how we look back and think, “Did anything happen in 2016? What did we do with all that time?” Even though the one thing I remember the most was thinking, “There is never enough time!”
Of course, a lot happened in 2016. Joe started his own business with my full approval and I was stoked to find that my husband is a tenacious and meticulous book keeper. He has taken full responsibility for his business and though I have helped him from time to time (he hates computers) I am so very relieved that this choice of his has not turned into a third full time job for me. (Which is secretly what I was really worried about. This is not my first rodeo and my past experience expected me to become drowned in someone else’s responsibilities.) Joe reminds me from time to time to not expect him to be like the men in my past but old habits die hard and I guess there is nothing wrong with my being pleasantly surprised by him. All in, his choosing to start his own business has been good for us. We’ve learned to tighten our belts and support each other. When Joe worked out of town it reminded us how much we want to be together. Right now I’m enjoying what its like to wake up with my husband for the first time when usually he would be gone two hours before me. And, for the last couple of weeks, I have enjoyed something I have never experienced before: A light on when I get home, my garage door open, the horses fed, a fire already started and my husband waiting for me. It is totally delightful.
Christmas ended up quieter for us then we had expected. After spending Friday and Saturday night with my family we had expected to drive the two hours Sunday to spend it with Joe’s family and then it started raining. An ice storm went through Minnesota leaving behind half an inch of ice and several inches of snow. It was bad. We (like most folks that holiday) decided to not take the risk. Major bummer. But there will always be more Christmases and holidays and I believe we made the right call to not drive. So, Joe and I ended up with all of Sunday and Monday to do what kids do after they opened all their presents the night before; we played. Which, because we’re adults, translates into; eating pizza and binge watching Game of Thrones because my awesome mom gave us all six seasons for xmas. It was pretty great. And now you know why I was MIA on Monday when it came to my blog duties 😉 a girl’s gotta make sacrifices from time to time and, of course, “Winter is coming.”
This spring I lost my dog and 2016 could never truly recover from there for me. My friends and family, and Joe, have all mentioned the idea of getting another dog but I just keep shaking my head. I have had a dog for the last 23 years of my life, I am truly a full on crazy dog person and being without a dog seems very very strange. But when I think of pulling another beasty into my arms it makes my chest tight and it makes me want to cry. I’m just not ready yet. This summer we fixed the roof on one of our little sheds, essentially saving it from collapse, we also completely cleaned out the barn – a horrific job that took me, my aunt and my mom four full days. Joe and I tackled creating a beautiful beachy fire pit for us that I can’t wait to use again next summer. I cleaned out the garage several times and finally one last time when I hauled all of my tools down to my basement workshop, our garage is now organized and makes me smile every time I step in it. I’m still working on the finishing touches in my basement but it is almost done. We went to Duluth for my mom’s family reunion and I had the opportunity to meet many family members who shared so many memories on our old farm from when they were just kids!
We also went camping and I remember how it felt when we finally got to the national park like such a relief to me, it felt like the first time I got a moment of peace alone with Joe in months. It is strange how you can spend time with another person, hours upon hours even, and yet not really spend a second with them at all. I am working on leaving things in my car before coming home at the end of the day. Things like work and worries and frustrations, things that cause me to look at him and not even see him because I’m so distracted. I am working on consciously forcing myself to lay things down when we have dinner together etc. What’s that they say about worry anyway? Its like a rocking chair, you’re just wasting time. Priorities really. If I’m sitting at dinner with my husband I can’t do anything about any of the crap I’m thinking about anyway maybe I should, instead, focus on what I’m doing right now like, have dinner with my husband. It is literally like putting your phone away and NOT looking at it again because its rude. I have gotten better but sometimes I feel like I’m a lost cause lol all we can do is the best we can do.
Happy new year everybody 🙂 I hope you spend it with people you love and have a bright 2017 to look forward to!